My Journey

My Journey to fine the true me started on Oct 6th 2010.  It was my dad's Birthday when i took a look at my life and desided I need to do something my Grandma was in the hospital and my mom was offering her to come live with them because she was unable to return home.  I thought how could i ever make that offer to my mom and dad when i am not even healthy myself how could i care for them.  My mom and dad mean the world to me and have always been there for me, When it  is my turn to step up to the plate could i do it There was no way I need to do something.

I started looking at my children and asked myself what are you teaching then they have no clue how to cook or eat clean take out and fast food was what i had give them most of there lifes and that was sure not what i wanted them to be able to teach my Grandchildren.  As a mother i was not doing my job i was just putting in time with the day to day living.  I had not shown my children how to love themselfs take care of themselfs or even there familys and i was ten years into there lives if i am going to give this a shot at changing the way my children care for themshelf the time was now to get my act together and be the changes i want to see in there lives and that means taking care of ME.

I have spent a great deal of time wasted with self hatred and in a dark place i would never want my children to ever end up.  The only way i can help them is by making a true effort to help myself show them i can change my way of thinking and the way i feeling about Myself.

I started Clean eating leaving a addiction to McDonalds that i still fight with most days and a soda crazy life my body never had any water other then what ever was mixed into the supper sized rootbeer i was downing the double burger meal with that i was eating. Ice cream candy bars chips anything i could eat fast when i was not at a fast food drive throw it you didn't need the dishies done to eat it it was alright in my books.  many many days i would only eat one meal so i would make it a double meal all at once and at late hours the closer to bed time the more i would eat my fitness workout was crawling out of bed in time for the kids to get home from school.

Today i have made a lot of changes with a whole lot more to go My highist weight that i know of was 338lbs in 2008 when i first tryed clean eating and gave up One Oct 6th my weight was 334lbs Today i am 286lbs i am so happy about that my last McDonalds meal was Oct 1st 2010.

I have had alot of slips already on my journey but my goal is to NEVER NEVER NEVER GIVE UP