The Light Bulb

Who runs the magical light bulb of life because i pay my power bill each month and mine is not working


Good morring i hope you are having a great day, I know i am i just wake up at 3:30 am gasping for air trust me it was not pretty but once i got my breath again i have declared this a great day because i have another day to spend with my children and loved ones and once again another chance to change my life style. oh and by the way this is my second time typing out this post the computer desided it was a good idea to up date but i figure anything worth saying is worth saying it twice.

I have spent the last 35 years ( more like 20) but you get the point looking for this dam light bulb moment people talk about where Life just makes since some days i think i look so hard i feel like i am doing a where is waldo book with my kids and have give up,  lost my chance at the magical light bulb moment.

Well i am sick and  tierd litraly from waiting for it there is no magic light bulb it's just me and the only light bulb i have been running on is a energy efficient  one. you know when you realy think about it each and every day we all have turned off the light turned it back on give the kids shit for not turning the light off

well what do we have to do each and every time we want light we have to get off are ass and flip the swich life is the same way if we want light we have to turn power on to it flip the swich by just doing it we dont think twice when we want our lights on we just do it think nothing of it when we start the next day we turn the lights on and off all over again. so our light is going to go one and off  or it well burn out what ever comes first that is just life .

and magic monday what's that all about who deamed monday the majic day. a great friend of mine asked me to do a test for her do just 30 lungs for her and add just 5 a day for one week till i got to 60 and see how just in one week how much stronger you can get , but me i keep putting it off till monday then next monday because you know everything starts on monday hell no monday is no more special then any of the other 7 days in a week  tuesday to tuesday is still a dam week. There is no magic monday so the excuse of i messed up today i well start on monday again what happens to all that time in between that we just give up on. 

I well tell you with me its just wasted gone nothing done with it but the time keeps moving even if we dont about three months ago i found out my mom was taking me on a trip of a life time driving with my auntie who has downs and lives life every day to her dream place in life Graceland going down one side of the usa and coming home on the other a trip of a life time for me and my kids so what have i done in the past 3 month sat on my butt had two heart svt's and layed around feeling sorry for myself that my life was not easyer.  and the only thing that got me, is two scard kids that are wondering if mom is going to be able to fit on the rides in Disneyland and if i do can my heart handle it and not have another svt.

I know better then that i am waiting for life to get easyer as my life pass me by i know 100% that you can do amazing things in just 3 month i have done it before i lost 40 pounds in my first three month eating clean and getting active and it was not easy but i loved it and the feel i got from living so why do we give up on the things we love. why in the world are we afraid of being happy its the best feeling in the world and its within our control.

I don't have to wait till i get time to clean out the cuboard , cook up clean food for a week, have enough money to buy new food, get a gym membership, find a diet bubby or buy a journel i just need to deside to turn the power on and start living. I wish you all a world of happniss, health and strengh for the hard times.

 know you well wast more days in life and you well sit on the couch every now and then but its ok we deside if we want the lights on or off in life with all that said i am getting of my butt to go to turn on my light even if its just for today if thats what i deside the its up to me no one else can control my switch of life. my uuuhhh now i get it moment i pick when it happence. and so do you.